Sunday, January 22, 2012

Wedding Whoops Link Up Party

 Joining a Wedding Whoops link up party with Jena @ Recently Roached!

Just this morning I made myself a promise that I would quit tweeting, blogging & FB'ing about our recent anniversary, but I couldn't resist sharing our Wedding Whoops from a l-o-n-g time ago.

Wally and I married in Hawaii during the first part of January. Just the two of us on a ten-day vacation to paradise in the middle of winter. What could go wrong? As it turns out, plenty!

Our flight home landed in Seattle in the dark, just after a small snowstorm. That alone was relatively exciting. Then, our car had a flat tire, and Wally had to change the tire...in the dark...in the slushy long-term parking lot. The fun begins and we hadn't even gotten home yet! After the tire was changed, we still had a 90 min. drive home. Our honeymoon was officially over and we were both scheduled to return to work the following morning.

The minute we entered our home, at the end of that extremely long day, we knew we had been had. You might call it vandalized, or a practical joke, or merely being mischievous. Some person or persons unknown had taken advantage of our absence and performed a wide variety of nefarious acts on our belongings.  To wit, the criminals:

  • Moved Wally's motorcycle from the basement garage into our kitchen.
  • Short-sheeted our bed, then moved it into the living room.
  • Rearranged record albums so the album covers did not match the records inside.
  • Rearranged furniture from three rooms to three different rooms.
  • Placed a gazillion little static beads in our bathtub.
  • Removed every label from every piece of canned goods in the house.
  • Strung Cling-Wrap across the toilet bowl.
  • Filled (I mean filled) the bathroom with crumpled newspapers
  • Left stinky tuna fish in the garbage disposal. 
  • Hid confetti everywhere..I mean everywhere: every drawer, every shoe, in the pockets of old coats, between the pages of books. Everywhere.

The worst part was that Wally could not stop laughing hysterically as we discovered each new atrocity. My anger increased at an exponential rate, while he simply thought this situation was the funniest thing he had ever seen. Suffice it to say our first married night in our own home did not go well.

The next day we found we had been the victims of three of Wally's friends. When they couldn't figure out how to break into our house, the next-door neighbor brought over beer and offered to show them the way in. Apparently they had a very good time, and the rest is history. Needless to say, we did not go to work the following day. In fact, we spent many, many days trying to get our house back to normal. I continued to find telltale pieces of confetti in unexpected places right up until we moved from that house 16 years later.

This sad tale of woe is not really a Wedding Whoops, but pretty darn close. I wouldn't recommend starting a marriage the way we did, but it obviously worked for us as we just celebrated our 30th anniversary. 

Looking forward to reading more stories!

4 comments:

  1. Liz - Hilarious!! I forgot this ever happened, but then remembered you calling to tell me this and how you were particularly upset by the newspapers & static beads in your bathroom. I especially love the switch of your records/album covers. Can see your face and Wally laughing throughout it all ... and here you are 30 years later. Love you both.

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  2. Ha ha! Oh my word. What terrible timing!! All you wanted to do was crawl into bed...
    Well at least one of you thought it was funny :) And now it makes for a good story!

    Thanks for linking up! :)

    P.S. How long did it take you to discover the labels off the cans? I wouldn't notice that until the next time I wanted to cook... which probably would have been a loooong time.

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    1. I think we noticed the missing labels the next day. To their credit, the criminals had marked each can with a number, and then hid a "key" so could identify the contents. Took me a few days to find the "key". Unfortunately, turns out it was not 100% accurate!

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  3. Bwaaaaaaaaaaahahahaha AWESOME, mom. I know about the confetti and the motorcycle but I don't think I knew about the specifics. I literally laughed out loud at the sentence, "When they couldn't figure out how to break into our house, the next-door neighbor brought over beer and offered to show them the way in." Figures!

    You're wonderful.

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